Conservative Party leader? Prime Minister of Canada?
Kevin O'Leary has officially entered the race to replace Stephen Harper as Conservative Party leader, with the reality TV star boasting less experience and fewer qualifications for the top job than your average Canadian high school student.
In fact, if O'Leary was held to the same standard as a high school student, he'd probably be lucky getting hired at Baskin Robbins.
Here are a few other signs O'Leary's future job prospects don't look bright:
1. Kevin O'Leary screwed up his résumé
O'Leary officially launched his leadership campaign Wednesday, but he forgot one important detail before throwing his hat in the ring.
Updating which country he lives in on his online résumé:
Of all the days to not update the Linkedin profile. pic.twitter.com/CewDgyGzyF— Sean Craig (@sdbcraig) January 18, 2017
Though a short time later, O'Leary made some changes to his resume:
There it is. pic.twitter.com/N7FzZO3RDb— Sean Craig (@sdbcraig) January 18, 2017
Simple mistake – after all, Kevin O'Leary hasn't actually called Canada "home" for 20-plus years.
The businessman and television personality moved to Boston, Massachusetts in 1994 and admits he now "spends most of his time there." He's been known to say: "Boston is my home."
Not to mention, O'Leary prefers spending Canada Day down in Nantucket where he can celebrate "magical" fourth of July weekends.
2. Kevin O'Leary's references don't check out
Nothing helps you get a job like glowing words from old coworkers vouching for your character.
Consider what his former Dragon's Den co-star Arlene Dickinson recently said:
"At his core, he's an opportunist. He doesn't do anything that doesn't offer a path to power ... Like all opportunists, Kevin shifts positions when it's convenient."
And she added this about O'Leary's business experience too:
"Kevin's been known to cut-and-run when things get bad. He did it with his business dealings with Mattel, he's done it with other business dealings that he's had. I mean, listen, I think you don't want someone leading the country who when things are bad, cuts and runs."
3. Kevin O'Leary has poor communication skills
In the workplace, O'Leary's communications style might be a giant headache for most HR departments.
Let's run through a quick list:
• There was the time O'Leary vowed to jail unionized workers if he's ever elected prime minister:
"Here's the right thing to do: elect me as prime minister for 15 minutes. I will make unions illegal. Anybody who remains a union member will be thrown in jail."
• There was the time O'Leary suggested unemployed workers, largely from the Maritimes, had infected Alberta with "socialism."
• There was also the time he advised a business student worried about work-life balance to dump his fiancé, because when you're wealthy, you can have "many girlfriends":
4. Kevin O'Leary doesn't understand the job he's applying for
Shouldn't the prime minister have some basic grasp of how Canada's institutions work?
O'Leary has previously proposed a "yes or no" referendum on all pipelines – something that's probably illegal and a vote O'Leary has a realistic shot at losing.
And earlier this week, O'Leary floated an unconstitutional idea to CTV News about auctioning off Senate seats to wealthy bidders who would have the power to veto bills passed by the democratically-elected House of Commons:
"I don't know why we can't have a hundred thousand or a couple hundred thousand committed each year per senator ... Instead of being a cost centre to Canada, why can't it be a profit centre?"
What could possibly go wrong?
5. Kevin O'Leary may not be competent for the job
Hope he plans on leaving his Celebrity Jeopardy appearance off his résumé:
Photo illustration: PumpkinSky. Used under Creative Commons license.